Party at Byakuya's
by toshi25
Summary: Yoruichi challenges Byakuya to a drinking party and things get out of hand.


Shout-out: the idea for this story was one of my best friends, Brittany

Disclaimer: Obviously I don't own Bleach

**Party at Byakuya's**

At last the battle with Aizen was over and things were slowly returning to normal in the Seireitei. Nonetheless, it had been another long day of meetings and paperwork. Byakuya was looking forward to a relaxing night during which he could unwind. Suddenly, however, Yoruichi appeared in the garden and stepped onto the engawa and into the large room.

"What are you doing here," Byakuya asked her.

"Is that how you treat an old friend," Yoruichi asked as she sat down at the table across from him. Byakuya raised an eyebrow but did not reply. Just then Yoruichi placed a bottle of saké on the table. "I hope you're not seriously thinking of doing calligraphy tonight," she added.

"And the alternative would be?"

"Obviously to have a drink with me," she responded.

"I think not," Byakuya said.

"Oh, afraid you can't keep up with me in yet another thing, Byakuya-bo," Yoruichi taunted.

"You're on, Shihouin Yoruichi," Byakuya said. Yoruichi smirked as she poured two cups of saké.

Ten minutes and two cups each later, Matsumoto and Yumichika showed up at the Kuchiki manor. "I knew I smelled a party," Matsumoto said with glee. "Mind if we join you?"

"Sure, sure, go ahead," Yoruichi said. Matsumoto eagerly took a seat and downed some saké. Yumichika was over on the far side of the room, muttering comments about the pottery and scrolls on the walls. After a few minutes, he joined them in drinking.

About twenty minutes later, Renji arrived with Ikkaku and Hisagi. "Taichou, are you drunk," Renji asked at once, the moment he saw Byakuya.

"Of course not," Byakuya said, despite his very red face.

"He totally is," Ikkaku whispered to Renji.

"This is awesome," Renji whispered back. "We so have to take full advantage of this." Hisagi had already taken a seat next to Matsumoto and slammed back his first drink. "I'll be right back," Renji announced to everyone before dashing off. Once he found Rikichi, he told him to inform all of the other divisions of the party in the 6th. Then he joined the others. Hardly any time had passed when Kyoraku showed up, carrying a few bottles of saké. It was then that the drinking games really started.

Meanwhile, Hitsugaya sipped green tea in the library; Nanao and Isane shared a table with him, also drinking tea as they took a break from the reports on which they were working.

Back at Byakuya's, Iba had arrived with Komamura as well as a handful of shinigami from various divisions. Karaoke was in full swing, and Byakuya belted out a song from kabuki. "He always turns us down when we have division-wide karaoke," Renji said in a low voice to Ikkaku. "This is unbelievable. By the way, where's Zaraki-taichou?"

"I'm sure he's on his way," Ikkaku said. "There's no way he'd miss this. But Yachiru's probably giving him directions, so they won't be here for a while yet."

"True," Renji agreed as he sipped more saké.

Some time later, Kuukaku arrived and in his drunken state, Byakuya decided it would be a good idea to launch fireworks in the house. Fortunately, they ran out after about a dozen flares, half of which left smoldering burns on the walls of the house.

Rukia had finally given up on trying to be a voice of reason and left the Kuchiki manor, returning to the 13th division. Sentarou and Kiyone were in a heated argument when she arrived. As far as she could tell, both had heard about the party she had just left and both wanted to go yet neither wanted to leave Ukitake with the other. She guessed they would argue all night long and end up missing the party. "Sounds like some pretty crazy stuff is happening at your house," Ukitake said to her.

"You've got that right," Rukia said. "Yoruichi-san challenged nii-sama to a drinking contest and there's no way he could say no to that," she added. "All I can say is that things will be ugly tomorrow morning."

Ukitake smiled. "Well, I'm glad I decided not to go. Kyoraku stopped by earlier and asked if I wanted to go with him."

"Well, I think you made the right decision, Taichou."

"I'm sure I did," Ukitake said. "Have a good night."

"You too," Rukia said before heading to the 13th division baths to enjoy the rest of her evening.

Back at the Kuchiki residence, Yumichika had fallen asleep. "Oh, let's draw on his face," Matsumoto declared.

"I have a brush," Byakuya said eagerly. "What should I draw," he asked.

"Give him a moustache," Renji suggested. "And a unibrow!"

"I'm going to braid his hair," Matsumoto said as Byakuya drew what Renji told him.

To everyone's surprise, Unohana arrived and joined in the celebrations, albeit in a remarkably restrained manner, in comparison to the others. She slowly sipped some saké and enjoyed the atmosphere. Even more shocking, however, was the arrival of Yamamoto. All waited with bated breath, expecting a scolding. So when he said, "Why didn't you invite me?" they breathed a sigh of relief and poured him some saké. Unohana wondered if Yamamoto hadn't already been into some saké until he sat next to her and watched from the side.

Finally, Kenpachi arrived, crashing through the only wall free from fireworks burns. "Yahoo, you made it, Ken-chan," Yachiru shouted from his shoulder.

"About time, too," he said. "I was getting thirsty."

"Zaraki, at last you join us," Byakuya said jovially. "Come sit down!" Kenpachi was slightly startled; normally he and Byakuya didn't get along at all.

"Fine by me," Kenpachi said. After downing a few cups of sake himself, he and Byakuya were trading back slaps and high-fives like old buddies.

"Unbelievable," Ikkaku muttered.

The antics continued until the wee hours of the morning until finally everyone had drifted off to sleep. When Byakuya awoke the next morning, he thought he was dreaming. For starters, he had Kyoraku's cheap hat on his head and his kenseikan were hanging on the ends of his hair. What's worse, he had been sleeping next to the indoor plants; curled up next to him was Yoruichi, with his Captain's coat as a blanket and his scarf as a pillow. His head throbbed and it only increased when he looked across the room. It looked like those fraternity houses in the living world. Shinigami slept sprawled across one another with saké bottles scattered throughout the room. As Byakuya saw the burns on the walls and the stains on the tatami mats, his headache only got worse. No one else was awake yet. Maybe this would be OK. He stood up and slowly made his way out of the room, trying to pretend none of this had happened.

Meanwhile, at the first division, Hitsugaya was staring around the empty room, startled. "Where the hell is everyone else? The meeting was supposed to start five minutes ago," he roared to Ukitake. None of the others had turned up.

"Well, you know there was that crazy party last night," Ukitake said. "It sounded like it got pretty intense."

"No wonder I didn't see Matsumoto this morning," Hitsugaya muttered. "Surely Yamamoto-soutaichou wasn't there, though?"

"As a matter of fact he was," Unohana said as she entered. Hitsugaya and Ukitake gaped at her. "Don't get me wrong," she added, "he simply had a glass or two of saké and watched the….antics, as I did. He said today's meeting would be postponed, but I thought he would have arrived to inform you himself."

"No matter," Ukitake replied. "Well, that explains it, then," he added to Hitsugaya.

"I guess so," Hitsugaya said. "Might as well head back then. Hopefully Matsumoto won't be too much of a pain."

Back at Byakuya's house, most of the partiers were still passed out in the living room. Fortunately Byakuya had found some umeboshi, which was good for hang-overs, or so he had heard. He sat upstairs, eating the umeboshi, trying to remember everything that happened last night. He knew Yoruichi had challenged him to a drinking game and obviously there had been a lot of alcohol involved. But why were there burns on the walls of the house? Why was he sleeping with a house plant? Why did Yoruichi have his Captain's coat, or worse, his scarf? His head throbbed some more, so he decided to stop thinking.

A few days later, the re-scheduled Captain's meeting, which included the Vice-Captains as well, occurred. Kurotsuchi walked in gleefully, which rarely happened, and announced, "I have the best evidence regarding my behavior studies," he declared. Everyone else in the room simply looked at him. "I was keen to do a study on behavior and found the perfect opportunity just the other day. Here, see for yourself," he said as he played a video.

Much to Byakuya's horror, the video was from the party at his house. Apparently Nemu had come in and recorded all of it. Byakuya watched the video in shock. Behind him, Renji was cursing as his video self egged Byakuya on, encouraging him to do more and more ridiculous things. Every time Renji thought the video was just about to end, something else, seemingly more drastic, would happen. Renji winced as a piece of pottery shattered. Byakuya was still disturbed that he had no memories of most of this night.

Finally when the video ended, Renji knew he was done for but was glad it was over. Everyone in the room turned to Byakuya. _Must maintain Kuchiki stoic-ness, must maintain Kuchiki stoic-ness_, he thought to himself as he tried to keep his face expressionless. Finally, Yamamoto said, "Well, that's a fascinating study. Moving on, I'd like to discuss some other matters." An eternity later, or at least that's how it felt to Renji, the meeting ended. Byakuya gave him a look as they returned to the sixth division, and Renji got the feeling he knew exactly how Byakuya's living room was going to get fixed.


End file.
